What is friendship really?

What is friendship really? It's a closeness, an intimacy, and it begins with trust. We meet someone, or a group of people, that we enjoy being with, and maybe the foundation of our enjoyment of another person is recognition that they are on our side and will not hurt us.

Friends help us over the bumps in the road. In the rough ride of life, friends are the only thing that seem to make it all worthwhile. I guess we could say I'm talking about finding love in the world.

Do you think we ALL have the potential to love one another? I'm talking about everyone in the whole world loving everyone else in the whole world. This was the dream of the hippie movement. It just didn't make sense to us (I was a hippie) why anyone would start unpleasantness with anyone else. Why would people act out of selfishness and greed, when the only consequence ultimately, would be hatred and war? Yet I have an answer to that question: people act out of selfishness and greed when they feel that there is no hope of being loved. Therefore, it is our place, those of us who believe that love is real, and that the love of God is real, to extend ourselves. We should avoid judging people who say and do awful things, and as much as it is possible for us, love them. Anyone who feels that someone is sincerely reaching out to them, will begin to let down their guard, and those of us who dare to love, can help them find healing and wholeness.

Friendship is a powerful thing. It helps us get through life, and it could help the world get through a very rough time.

♬    Serena Ryder: Last Night I Had The Strangest Dream

Singing A Love Song (Amy Grant)

Singing A Love Song (Amy Grant) from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

Lazy Afternoon (Vanessa Williams

Lazy Afternoon (Vanessa Williams) from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

God Loves You

God Loves You (Jaci Velasquez) from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

Deliverance Is Available

Deliverance Is Available from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

Lay Your Burden Down

Lay Your Burden Down (Chuck Girard) from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

I am my friend, God is my friend, and real friends are my friends

Hi. Been a long time hasn't it? I've been sick. But the good news is I'm getting better. Getting stronger. Let me tell you, God does not enjoy death and decay. He enjoys life and flourishing. And as soon as I began to unite with Him in His cause, to bring recovery, that very second He began to deliver me! The very second!

I was filled with self pity. Sooo many reasons to feel that life had been unfair to me. But self pity is a self pit! The more I engaged in feeling sorry for myself the more miserable and unhappy I became. Not a good feeling. Is sadness a good feeling? Maybe at times it's appropriate. But excessive sadness has never helped anyone.

Life has its difficult moments and situations. But with God, we can make it. Cry out to Him and ask Him to help you out of your rut. He is waiting to receive your prayers. He will honor your faith. Hang in there, believe, and He will answer you.

♬   Guy Penrod: I Will  Be With You

Deliverance Is Available (Vicki Yohe) from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

If we do our best, we know that we deserve the best

♬.  HE'LL TAKE CARE OF THE REST
by Keith Green

You know it ain't no use in banging your head
Up against that cold stone wall
'Cause nobody's perfect, except for the Lord
And even the best bound to fall

Remember He is the vine and you are the branch
He'd love to get you through it and if you'd give Him a chance
Just keep doing your best and pray that it's blessed
And Jesus takes care of the rest

Yes the Lord said that, "He'll take care of the rest", He's gonna do it
Where He'll take care of the rest, He'll see you through it, yeah
Where He'll take care of the rest, the devil blew it
Where He'll take care of the, He'll take care of the rest

Just think about Moses, in front of the burning bush
Barefoot on the holy ground
You know, he must have been thinking
Hey what's an old dude like me gonna tell 'em all
When I go down, go down Moses

The Lord said, "Hey Moe
Don't you worry about you going down south
I'll be saying every word that comes out of your mouth
You just keep doing your best and pray that it's blessed
Hey Moe, I'll take care of the rest"

Yes the Lord said that
"He'll take care of the rest", He's gonna do it
Where He'll take care of the rest, He'll see you through it, yeah
Where He'll take care of the rest, oh, Pharaoh blew it
He'll take care of the, He'll take care of the rest

Just believe and you'll receive, that comfort you need
You just think about all those lonely people you know
They've got everything they want, but they got empty souls
Well, He'll take care of the, He'll take care of the
He'll take care of the, care of the rest

You just think about Noah, toting his umbrella
When there wasn't a cloud in the sky

\n All his neighbors would laugh at his patchy raft
And they would snicker as he'd passed by

But the Lord said, "Hey Noah
Be cool, you just keep building that boat
It's just a matter of time till they see who's gonna float
You just keep doing your best, and pray that it's blessed
Hey Noah, I'll take care of the rest, I'm the weatherman"

The Lord said that
"He'll take care of the rest", He's gonna do it
He'll take care of the rest, He'll see you through it, yeah
Where He'll take care of the rest, his neighbors blew it
He'll take care of the, He'll take care of the

He'll take care of the rest, he's gonna do it
He's gonna do it yeah
He'll take care of the rest
Only Jesus can see you through it
He'll take care of the rest
Yes, yes, yes
He'll take care of the, He'll take care of the

He'll take care of the rest
You better believe it
He'll take care of the rest
Only the pure at heart receive it
He'll take care of the rest
Yes, yes, yes
He'll take care of the, he'll take care of the

He'll take care of the rest
Hallelujah
He'll take care of the rest
Only Jesus can give it to you
He'll take care of the rest
He'll take care of the rest.

The Love of God - FBC Choir, FBC Jacksonville, FL

Be with y'all as soon as I can.

The only hope left for America is our prayers

♬    FRIEND OF GOD

I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
He calls me friend

[Lead:]
Who am I that You are mindful of me
That You hear me, when I call
Is it true that you are thinking of me
How You love me
It's amazing
[Choir sings lead verse]

[Chorus:]
I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
He calls me friend
[repeat]

[Lead:] What a privilege it is

[Vamp:]
God almighty Lord of Glory
You have called me friend

Friendly thoughts

What are you thinking about during many of your waking hours? I've noticed that many of my friends dwell on worrisome thoughts of one type or another. Many people spend a great deal of time reacting to shocking stories they hear on the media, for one example. There are also many people who allow themselves to be manipulated by envious friends, who in subtle ways take away their confidence. Remember, people who know us well also know where our soft spots are, and though it hurts to think they would ever want to hurt us, we have to look at their background; have they perhaps not had any of the lucky breaks that we had? And therefore, can we overlook their envious feelings? Family members can also get us feeling inadequate. Parents saying "you're not a good son or daughter", children saying, "you're not a good mother or father". These kinds of statements, from those who mean the world to us, can leave us distraught and confused.

So what should we do to clear our minds of all kinds of intense worries? I will simply offer you some advice I read many many years ago in a tract that was handed to me in the street. Basically. the tract said to be alert to when these worrisome thoughts enter your mind. It then said, if we want to push a negative thought out of our mind, we need to be prepared with a healthy, positive thought we can put in to take its place. So the idea is to come up with a list of positive thoughts that we can push into our minds when we want to push a negative thought  out. We also would, as much as we can, prepare ourselves with a list the negative, bothersome thoughts that we want to eliminate.

I had to persevere at it a little, but believe it or not this simple technique worked for me. It helped me get control of my thinking.

  ♬     Pam Mark Hall: Dwell On These Things

Get what you want, even if it's not exactly what you want

Friends, I hope you can digest this, because this is huge. Why are you asking God for more wisdom, when you're not even using the understanding He has already given you?

A photo posted by A Friendly Human Being (@afriendlyhumanbeing) on May 15, 2016 at 7:47p

This is a subject I have been looking at a lot lately. Wisdom. The Bible tells us that wisdom can potentially get us everything we want, if we use it properly. Now this verse about wisdom from Proverbs chapter 17, asks us, why are we saying how very much we want wisdom, when we are not even showing that we are prepared to use it?

Just last night I once again caught myself displaying an attitude that made it clear that I wanted to wander away from wisdom. My respiratory therapist was working with me, and I asked her to jack up my oxygen supply, and she did not want to do it. I told her I was short of breath, but she said the vent reflected I was receiving enough oxygen at the time. Another case of not being able to have my way. And so I began to scoff (in my mind). I decided that she was just a mean respiratory therapist who enjoyed depriving patients of their oxygen. I decided she was being unkind.

I never took a moment to think maybe I needed to respect her decision as a professional. I reacted just as Psalm 1 says a blessed person does not do. "Walk in the counsel of the ungodly, sit in the seat of sinners, and stand in the way of scorners". Fortunately I did go ahead and make the best of it. But situations like this are perfect opportunities to show the life of Christ in me by being submissive. And this, I believe is a good and worthy goal.

m PDT

Doctor Doctor: Might I show you the power beyond you and I?

Hi. Notice I don't say good morning. It's been an awful morning. Had an argument with some Dr. I bruised his totally inflated ego. Some of these Dr. really and truly think they're God. It's so ugly. So anyways, now I'm sitting here and I can barely breathe. And he told me I just need to relax so I said well let me get an ativan (which helps me relax) but he said if I take an ativan it will make my numbers drop even lower. Anyone see the contradictory thinking there? Idol gods. That's what these Drs are. And a lot of people in medicine. I'm thinking of reporting him.

A photo posted by A Friendly Human Being (@afriendlyhumanbeing) on May 11, 2016 at 4:53a

 OK. Once again I am presenting you with a post from my Instagram. I want to continue on the topic of conflict, and how rather run from it, or place blame on others who are involved, I want to raise the question: what can I learn from what happened here?

We see once again the subject of idolatry. People who we see as responsible for helping us stay alive, wouldn't it seem natural to put them on a level with God? And as with God, so it is with people; we get indignant when we can't run the show. Having to trust someone else is not easy.

But bringing people to Christ is not easy, and to make Christ visible to skeptics and doubters, it requires doing things differently than the way we would naturally tend to do them.

So are doctors conceited? Yes. Do they make decisions that we don't agree with? Yes. Do we want them to see Christ in us? If the answer is yes, than we need to show them,  not so much that we trust them, but that we trust the power beyond them: the power of Jesus Christ, who let go, for our sake, of getting His own way. 

So are doctors conceited? Yes. Do they make decisions that we don't agree with? Yes. Do we want them to see Christ in us? If the answer is yes, than we need to show them,  not so much that we trust them, but that we trust the power beyond them: the power of Jesus Christ, who let go, for our sake, of getting His own way. m PDT

Accepting the situations we find ourselves in, and learning to appreciate them

OK. You know why I think we should practice accepting and appreciating what we have? We might not get anything better. A new house might not turn out to be a better house. A new boyfriend/husband might not turn out to be a better boyfriend/husband a new gender might not be a better gender. Changing our surroundings when life doesn't make us happy can be a terrible mistake. Usually, if we feel unhappy, the one we need to change is ourselves.

Got a real wakeup call about this point recently. I don't how much I have written about it on this blog, but some of you may have figured out that I have almost ongoing friction with the respiratory department where I reside. Now I could carry on and say, "Oh that wicked respiratory department!" And I could think of a few choice criticisms to make. Lazy, nasty attitude, spiteful, etc. But wait a minute. Is it possible that I have something to do with the friction experienced between me and the respiratory department?

Here's a big one folks. I can't believe I'm actually about to confess this: IDOLATRY. Yep. Making the respiratory department more important than the Lord. Rather than having faith that it is the Lord who is providing me with oxygen and breath, I'm seeing it as - my breathing treatments, my suctions, the procedures carried out by the respiratory personnel, as the power behind my breathing.

I imagine this puts the people who work in respiratory under a great deal of pressure, which probably  is the reason why we seldom get along. I am making them responsible for way too much.

But do you see how changing nursing homes, or constantly switching therapists (which I do) would in nowise solve the problem? It would only make matters worse! Friends, if you are unhappy, chances are you are actually unhappy with yourself, and not any external factor.

♬  Rebecca St. James: Breathe 

I Can Do All Things

It seems like no matter what we women say, one way or another, we are always concerned about getting in shape, and I'm realizing I'm no exception.

Caring gives life

Good afternoon! And it's a very special afternoon for me because I have reached my goals here at the hospital, and they are sending me home. I may have mentioned in a previous blog that I struggle with breathing problems. Well, my problems became very serious. My breathing became so poor that they could no longer keep me in the nursing home I reside at unless there was some intervention.

And so, I was sent to a place called Kindred Hospital in Havertown, Pennsylvania, where they worked a miracle with me. This is a place where respiratory therapists take their work very very seriously. I would say all the employees: the nurses, the nurse's aides, and the respiratory therapists are very focused on accuracy, both in collecting patient data, and responding to it. This being the case, Kindred Hospital did what many people, including myself assumed was impossible. They got my breathing back on track, and made it possible for me to return to a place I've called home for 14 years.

Many of my friends too, both online and off, consistently prayed for me and encouraged me. God used Kindred Hospital to respond to my need. May He bless the work that Kindred Hospital is doing.

♬    Dallas Holm: I've Never Seen The Righteous Forsaken

Supporting the direction our friends are going in, even if we do not personally agree with

I think of my brother growing up. I'm 16 years older than he, and it was tempting to share with him all kinds of pearls of wisdom I had learned. But then I thought, you know what? Life is an adventure. If I tell him step by step how to achieve certain things, and what to avoid, I will be robbing him of the excitement of discovering what his life is all about, which could be very very different from my perception of life.

Each person's life is very different. Each person sees Truth in their own way. Each person's attitude toward Truth is different, and we must allow our friends to learn about life in their own way, and accept the uniqueness of how they live and what they value.

Let me share with you the wisdom my parents exercised when I was a teenager. I was a hippie, and my parents were worried about my future. It was important to them that I decide on a profession and go to college to get training to prepare for it. Well, they got more and more tense about the issue, and the more they pressured me, the less interested I became in doing as they suggested.

Finally, the arguing in the house got so intense that I ran away from home. Well, they found me, and when I was back home, I told them, "I don't want to work, I don't want to go to college. I just want to quit school and find a cheap apartment." It was my way of telling them to back off. And back off they did. They completely stopped complaining about anything I did. They allowed me to go out with my boyfriend every night, and what was nice was they knew when I came home I was usually hungry, so they kept the refrigerator stocked with the things I liked to eat.

Well, as fate would have it, after
short while my boyfriend and I broke up. To get some consolation, and a change of atmosphere, I went to spend the weekend with a girlfriend. Well, this friend of mine, Ellen, was in college, and that weekend she told me all about what a great experience it was.

Therefore, when I returned home, I said "Mom and Dad, I want to go to college". It was when they showed me acceptance, and loved me for the person I was, that I ended up agreeing with them about my future.

My feeling is, we need to give our friends the freedom to be exactly who they are. Let them do what works for them. This way we will be supporting them as they fulfill their destiny.

♬   Billy Joel: My Life

The Joy Of The Lord

The Joy Of The Lord (music by Twila Paris) from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

So, my dear friends, I've been a little sick. Matter of fact I'm in the hospital. Breathing problems. It's so scary. But I have now an idea for a blog, and hopefully soon I'll do a little writing, because I know that's what you enjoy. Know that in my heart I'm with you, longing to share thoughts about friendship.

Finding the strength to be kind

♬    DEFINING MOMENT
        by NewSong

There comes a time in every heart
A time of real decision
When we reach the point of choosing
How we will live our lives

All our hopes, all our dreams
Will rise up from that moment
The moment we surrender
And choose to fallow Christ

He's been waiting all our lives to hear us say
"I am Yours, Lord, take my hand and lead the way"

When you believe He's all you need
That will be your defining moment
As you live your life walking in His light
Trusting Him completely
That will be, that will be your defining moment

All I have, all I am is resting in His promise
The promise that He'll make me everything that I should be
I will live, I will die, for the cause He set before me
To take this love in side my heart for all the world to see

Oh, all of heaven celebrates when they hear someone say
"I am Yours, Lord, take my hand and lead the way"

When you believe He's all you need
That will be your defining moment
As you live your life walking in His light
Trusting Him completely
That will be, that will be your defining moment, yeah

His amazing grace is such a mystery, yeah
How in an instant it can make your life complete

When you believe He's all you need
That will be your defining moment
As you live your life walking in His light
Trusting Him completely

When you believe He's all you need
That will be your defining moment
As you live your life walking in His light
Trusting Him completely
That will be, that will be your defining moment, oh, oh

Your defining moment, oh
Your defining moment

Expectations

When there is friction within a friendship, what is at the root of it? Doesn't a problem getting along with a friend almost always narrow down to a difference of opinion about what should be expected from one or the other friend? I think of my friend Linda, from Jr. High School. Linda used to get invited to more occasions than I did, such as parties and dances. Well, she knew it would make me feel inferior if she told me, so she would cover it up somehow, and try to hide from me that she was going somewhere. NOW, this is ugly: I would get on her case for being dishonest. I mean, I would ram the subject to the ground, that a friend is supposed to be perfectly honest. And the ugly thing is that I knew the whole time, that she only concealed it to spare my feelings. So here, I had Linda in a back lock, when she had actually tried to do the right things, and I knew it.

When there is so much negativity within a friendship,  what is to be done? All I can think is to just make a general rule for friendship. Let go of expectations. Personal expectations such as I held my friend Linda to, are likely to cause damage. When we are unpleasant to a friend, we are often refusing to look at the issue from his or her point of view.

Suppose the opposite happened. Suppose I had made a rule for my friendship with Linda, that I was going to love and accept her words and actions no matter what my own personal opinion of her conduct was. When, she was invited out, and she didn't want me to know, I would not make her accountable for it. Our friendship would continue to flow. I would actually feel better about myself because I applied mercy to the situation, than I would have felt had I satisfied my unattractive feelings of envy.

There is a little verse in what is called The Ethics of the Fathers in the Talmud, which is a book of Jewish interpretation of all that is written in the Old Testament. Anyways, what comes to mind is:

There are four types of people

one who says what's mine is mine and what's yours is yours - that is the mark of an average person.

One who says what's mine is yours and what's yours is mine - that is the mark of an ignorant person

One who says what's mine is yours and what's yours is yours  - that is the mark of a Godly man.

One who says what's yours is mine and what's mine is mine - that is the mark of an evil man.

If we seek the happiness of our friends, above our own happiness, we will end up making both ourselves and our friends feel more satisfied within our friendships.

♬    The Who: Behind Blue Eyes

Do Right

Seek and you shall find

♬    FIND A WAY
by Amy Grant

You tell me your friends are distant
You tell me your man's untrue
You tell me that you've been walked on
And how you feel abused

So you stand here an angry young woman
Taking all the pain to heart
I hear you saying you want to see changes
But you don't know how to start

[Chorus:]
Love will find a way (How do you know)
Love will find a way (How can you see)
I know it's hard to see the past and still believe
Love is gonna find a way
I know that
Love will find a way (A way to go)
Love can make a way (Only love can know)
Leave behind the doubt
Love's the only out
Love will surely find a way

I know this life is a strange thing
I can't answer all the why's
Tragedy always finds me
And I'm taken again by surprise

I could stand here an angry young woman
Taking all the pain to heart
But I know that love can bring changes
And so we've got to move on

[Chorus]
Love will find a way (How do you know)
Love will find a way (How can you see)
I know it's hard to see the past and still believe
Love is gonna find a way
I know that
Love will find a way (A way to go)
Love can make a way (Only love can know)
Leave behind the doubt
Love's the only out
Love will surely find a way

If our God His Son not sparing
Came to rescue you
Is there any circumstance
That He can't see you through

[Chorus]
Love will find a way (How do you know)
Love will find a way (How can you see)
I know it's hard to see the past and still believe
Love is gonna find a way
I know that
Love will find a way (A way to go)
Love can make a way (Only love can know)
Leave behind the doubt
Love's the only out
Love will surely find a way

Insist on Sincerity

Good evening my dear friends! Gosh it's hard to beilieve I am finally connecting with you after such a long time. See, I landed up in the hospital with breathing problems. It's a little scary, but hopefully the good Lord is staying on top of it. That's what we worship Him for, eh?

So this evening I want to talk about sincere friends, and I want to begin by sharing a not so well known Bible passage about two sons.

“What do you think? There was a man who had two sons. He went to the first and said, ‘Son, go and work today in the vineyard.’ “‘I will not,’ he answered, but later he changed his mind and went. “Then the father went to the other son and said the same thing. He answered, ‘I will, sir,’ but he did not go. “Which of the two did what his father wanted?” “The first,” they answered. -Matthew 21:28-32 First impressions, huh? People can make a glowing first impression, and make you think they're God's gift. But you know something? They just don't have it in their heart. They probably wish intensely that they were the person they are pretending to be, but it's not there. And so, an important thing about forming healthy friendships is: Be realistic. How much can you really give to your friend(s)? How much can you really hope to receive from our friend(s)? And BE the person you are. Avoid getting yourself lost in a lot of meaningless drama. After practicing this a few days, I think real enjoyment and fun will come back into your life. ♬  The 4 Non Blondes: What's Up

In His Time

Let's take our chance at life, and give it our utmost!

Here is something that was posted to my Instagram. I thought it was strong and
inspiring.

WHY we do, WHAT we DO! Whose life will you positively touch each day? #FightWinSurvive www.FightWinSurvive.com

A photo posted by Fight...Win...Survive (@fightwinsurvive) on Mar 14, 2016 at 10:45am PDT

A brand new subject: making NEW friends!

I hope all of us are open to making new friends and beginning new relationships. Recently, I have made some new friends. Then too, it's really magical when someone you've always seen hanging around, and you all of a sudden notice each other and become excited about things you like in each other that you never noticed before.

A banal relationship can suddenly become meaningful, and you know what it takes? Patience. Relinquishing our usual set of expectations in order to learn about how somebody else sees the world. So often we scoff at people who are living life differently from us. My friends, you will never make new friends this way. You will never learn more about people, or human nature if you insist that your way of living, your values, your likes and dislikes about people are the only ones that exist.

I have noticed that when I am jealous of somebody for whatever reason, I am quick to pull out my list of standards and decide that this person does not match up, and I rationalize that he or she is inferior to me. Imagine if I let go of that! Imagine if I let go of that from my heart, and accepted someone even though I felt threatened by him or her! I could end up being friends with a really cool person! Jealousy is such a destroyer of both the one who feels it and the one who it is aimed at.

So making new friends requires an open mind. And it can be very exciting to discover both new things about people, and new things about ourselves. Let us all pull ourselves out of the rut we are in with our predetermined expectations. They can only lock us into a place where there can be no progress.

♬    Dionne Warwick: Don't Make Me Over

In Moments Like These

In Moments Like These from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

Wilson Phillips - Hold On

When those who surround us are not our friends, and we very much need a friend

Hi. I want to write something positive about a very negative type of situation. The reason I must write something positive about it is that if I don't find something positive in it, my condition will get worse. This is how sensitive I am.

So the situation I want to introduce is: when the people who surround us are clearly not our friends, yet we are very much in need of a friend. Sounds very much like what children who are victims of bullying go through. It's painful. But let me direct you once again to some song lyrics. In the song "Hold On", the band Wilson Phillips suggests:

                "Open your heart and your mind
                 Is it really fair to feel this way inside?"

And I have to answer this question, "No. I am not being fair to myself when I dwell on negative, hurtful thoughts that will not solve my problem." So you know what comes to mind? Smile! Share sunshine with others. Give more, take less. What can I do to make other people's day better? Many easy ways I can think of to make a number of people's lives better.

Are there people who want to be your friends, but who you have shut out? For me, the answer to this question would be YES. Why weep over people who do not share my views and my goals, when there are people right at my fingertips who do appreciate my ideas and where I'm trying to go?

As I began this blog segment I felt it was going to be hopeless trying to find something positive to say on this subject. How very wrong I was! Let's practice giving our friendship to those who sincerely want it. Those who remain skeptical about us, we should be polite to them as well. We can think of them as people "who will one day soon come to like and understand us."

♬     Wilson Phillips: Hold On

God Is So Good

Aging - being our own ally when time becomes a foe

Hi. I want to address a very difficult topic, because it is something I am going through right now in my life, and it is painful, both mentally and physically. AGING. Now, I fall right in the middle of what was termed the "baby boomer" generation. 'Baby boomers' are people who were born in a period of time from the mid-fifties to probably the mid to late sixties; a time after WWII, when many people were eager to settle down and start a family. Well anyways, now, the children that were made during that time, have grown older, and many, or most of us are now aging.

Aging is difficult. I  am now in my late 50s, and I feel like at one point in my recent years an iron gate was shut and bolted, and the privileges of being young and pretty and innocent have been shut away from me. Now that I am going to be 60 in two years, I have threatening health problems and there are things I can no longer do. In addition to this, my mother has passed away, and my Dad has lost some of the mental and physical strength he enjoyed most of his life. All of this makes aging very difficult indeed.

But we are going to talk about how we can make aging a more positive experience. One thing I've noticed helps me is humor, and being able to laugh at myself. For instance, I saw a picture that said, " I'm not old. I'm 25 plus shipping and handling" ☺. Also, good friends help. Having people who love me and who respect me. And I'm really glad I've been up front about my disability and the type of housing I'm in, because had I tried to conceal these things, and then this aging experience kicked in, my life would have toppled down like a house of cards.

Then too, as I listened to my musical selection for this blog, Amy Grant's 1974, I noticed that there are attitudes I could adopt that would make my life happier. 1974, is a song about how totally enthralled Amy Grant was with Jesus Christ when she first discovered that he loved her deeply and unconditionally. During this time in her life, God, and serving Him, meant everything to her. I'm quite sure that if I were to fall in love with Jesus all over again, and stop feeling sorry for myself because certain things have not worked out right (yet), I would be a much happier person.

Here in this nursing home, the people I spend most of my time with are kind of fanatical about measurements. Blood pressure, pulse, temperature, respirations. But I do not have to let all these measurements dictate to me who I am. I can refuse to look at myself in this limited way, and embrace the me who is a blessed servant of God, someone who God loves and cherishes.

We can partner with ourselves against the thought that the negative things about aging define us. Let us become loyal friends to the souls within us. So loyal that we don't want to bother our minds with any thoughts that could weaken us. We can create our own iron gate. A gate that shuts away from us all the thoughts that make us feel sad and gloomy. We can break away from worry and see ourselves as wondrous human beings, full of life and potential.

♬    Amy Grant: 1974

Something Beautiful

Friendly, but never a friend

OK, I'm going to get right to it: nobody wants to be bothered with me, and I don't blame them. I can be very fussy, and picayune, and in addition to that, I become cruel when people don't meet my picayune standards. And even when they do try their best, and they live up to my standards, I will still unexpectedly be cruel.

All I can say is I wish to God I was nicer. I don't know how I got this way, but the only positive thing I can say about it is I wish I could be warmer and able to be close, and able to give love that lasts. Maybe it is because I am doing lasting work with a multitude on the Internet, that it is difficult for me to think about caring for people on a one on one basis. I can also say that I have been hurt very badly by people I truly loved very very much.

But trying to figure out how I became so unable to give back is not going to help now. I am in the present now, and I need to really really want to change, or I will continue hurting people and staying isolated. How can I change, and what first steps can I take to change? The first step is always thought to be: recognition. This I am doing even right now. I am admitting that I am a hurtful person, and I am also admitting that I understand why people avoid getting involved with me. There are obviously, reasons that are not so nice for why people don't wanna be bothered with me, such as, I am not powerful or wealthy, but I am singling out one reason, being that I am emotionally unable to give back. Because people would be drawn to me regardless, if I was at all able to form healthy relationships.

So we begin with recognition. But recognition is nothing without a sincere desire and will to change. I have to confess here, I am so afraid of being hurt, that I do not care if I am no longer fit to have a close personal relationship with someone. And I forgive myself for this. Right or wrong, people have been beastly to me, and I wish to stay to myself and offer love from afar. The concern is I may be misperceiving  the care or lack of care that people have given me. I may be making mountains out of molehills, and not receiving love even though it is being offered. In fact, I can see as I think about it that this is true. But will I ever trust myself to handle myself within a friendship? This still remains the question. It is a serious question for me. It is a question, or shall I say, a doubt that needs to be prayed over. Something that I even need to make a priority in prayer.

♬     Nora Jones: Don't Know Why

Happy Valentine's Day! You belong to somebody

♬    I AM HIS AND HE IS MINE
         by. Jackson Taylor


Loved with everlasting love, led by grace that love to know;
Gracious Spirit from above, Thou hast taught me it is so!
O this full and perfect peace! O this transport all divine!
In a love which cannot cease, I am His, and He is mine.
In a love which cannot cease, I am His, and He is mine.

Heav’n above is softer blue, Earth around is sweeter green!
Something lives in every hue Christless eyes have never seen;
Birds with gladder songs o’erflow, flowers with deeper beauties shine,
Since I know, as now I know, I am His, and He is mine.
Since I know, as now I know, I am His, and He is mine.

Things that once were wild alarms cannot now disturb my rest;
Closed in everlasting arms, pillowed on the loving breast.
O to lie forever here, doubt and care and self resign,
While He whispers in my ear, I am His, and He is mine.
While He whispers in my ear, I am His, and He is mine.

His forever, only His; Who the Lord and me shall part?
Ah, with what a rest of bliss Christ can fill the loving heart!
Heav’n and earth may fade and flee, firstborn light in gloom decline;
But while God and I shall be, I am His, and He is mine.
But while God and I shall be, I am His, and He is mine.

I Commit My Love To You

A song that tells it like it is about what friendship
and love should be about

Stand from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

With the hard winter we're having and the stress over the coming election, we need to hold onto our faith.

Lent is coming

OK. Apparently the season of Lent is coming up. Does everyone know what the season of Lent is, or otherwise called "the Lenten season"? Well, I'm sure there are numerous people who may not know, because quite honestly I grew up Jewish, and for many many years, I didn't have the vaguest idea what Lent was.

Lent begins with Ash Wednesday, and I believe ends on Good Friday, or else Easter Sunday. I really do not know much about it even now, but I only know that some Christian denominations, and definitely the Catholic Church, see the weeks of Lent as a time to humble ourselves. A time to be aware of how weak we are, and how very easily the pressures of the world influence us to do things that are not in line with our view of ourselves as servants of God. And therefore, the Church calls upon us to give up something specific, to serve to remind us of our sorrow for our lack of ability to be faithful to Jesus.

I liked these words of Pope Francis about Lent so much that I copied them, and I will now paste them here:

Our beloved Pope Francis offers the following wisdom on the penitential season of Lent:
“As a way of overcoming indifference and our pretensions to self-sufficiency, I would invite everyone to live this Lent as an opportunity for engaging in what Benedict XVI called a formation of the heart (cf. Deus Caritas Est, 31). A merciful heart does not mean a weak heart. Anyone who wishes to be merciful must have a strong and steadfast heart, closed to the tempter but open to God. A heart which lets itself be pierced by the Spirit so as to bring love along the roads that lead to our brothers and sisters. And, ultimately, a poor heart, one which realizes its own poverty and gives itself freely for others”.

I am sharing this with you just to maybe open your eyes to some thoughts on religion and spirituality that people have established over the years. I took a little quiz they offered to help someone figure out what to give up, and I was told to serve the poor. So, many years ago, before I was here in this nursing home, I taught literacy, and that would be something I would have really liked to do. As things stand now, I would like to give some more deep thought to how I could best deepen my service to God for Lent. A good one for me might have to do with waiting a little longer before I put my buzzer on, or holding my tongue when I feel indignant.

Here is the link to the quiz to help people think about what they should give up, in case you're interested.

♬.  Amy Grant: O Sacred Head

My Life Is In Your Hands

Staying connected: The testimony unfolds

I have been in church circles before. I've been a part of various prison ministries, street evangelism, and basically what I'm referring to is groups that go out and share about the offer of Salvation through faith in Jesus Christ. And going out to talk to different kinds of people about Christ, there was always a strategy we prepared: what verses in the Bible to talk about, what to tell people about ourselves and how we had changed after believing... stuff like that.

But what I notice happening over a span of time is something very much more powerful. As I live my life before my friends and people who have known me over time, they have seen me repeatedly die, and then come to Life. And those who have observed me die, and resurrect, have learned what is really important to me, and what God has validated. As those of you who have been reading my blog over a course of time have seen me make my mistakes, you have also seen when, how and why Jesus Christ has sustained me.

We have stayed connected. Recently, I even got a phone call from my boyfriend of 14 years, Andre. It was not the best choice he could have made, but he had to move from the facility we lived in together. And it seemed that for a while he and I were thinking "good riddance". But as we spent time away from each other, we realized how necessary we had become to one another. It was the span of time that we had become familiar with one another that became important. The comfort level we had achieved together. And we saw that Christ's life within our relationship was refusing to die.

So we watch one another live, die, and live again. We see each other mess up, and we see what the Lord resurrects, and what He allows to get left behind. As we stay connected, we see how very important love is. We recognize the caring which is the balm that fits each one of us for the Resurrection.

♬      Dallas Holm: Rise Again

Say Once More, a song of appreciation by Amy Grant

♬      SAY ONCE MORE
          by Amy Grant

(Ohhh....)

Let me say once more that I love you,
Let me say one time, maybe two,
That I love the way that you love me,
And I wish I knew more of you.

Let me say once more that I love you,
Let me say one time, maybe two,
That I love the way that you love me,
And I wish I knew more of you.

Tell me that time can't erase
This look of love on your face.

Let me say once more that I need you,
One more time or just maybe two.
Oh, my life will always be richer
For the time I've spent here with you.

Let me say once more that I love you,
Let me say one time, maybe two,
That I love the way that you love me,
And I wish I knew more of you.

Tell me that time won't erase
The way that my heart sees your face.

I call your name,
You look my way,
It's clear you trust each word I say.
When life is long and problems come,
You'll always be my only one.
So now we're standing face to face,
And with one look your eyes embrace me.
Squeeze away each haunting fear,
And say the words I long to hear.

Tell me that time won't erase
This look of love.

Ohhhh....

Let me say once more.
I love you.
I do, I do, I do, I do, I do.

Let me say once more that I love you,
Let me say one time, maybe two,
That I love the way that you love me,
And I wish I knew more of you.

Let me say once more that I love you,
One more time or just maybe two,
That I love the way that you love me,
And I want to know more of you.

Someone sees, revisited

Well, I learned something today. God gets all the glory. I should never make the assumption that my own hands, in some clever way, have wrought me the victory. You see, earlier today, i read, for no good reason, and in disobedience to Jesus' teaching about praying in secret, I shared with my respiratory therapist, some of what I was sharing with you all about asking for prayer. And therefore, it appears that when I fell asleep for an hour or so, the respiratory therapist snuck, and messed up my ventilator settings in an attempt to make it appear as if God had not really answered our prayers, and as if God was displeased with me. But because I do not give up too easily, I figured out that something was wrong with the settings. I inhaled, and as I inhaled, I evaluated the details of when and how the vent was failing to allow me to breathe properly. Well, to make a long story short, I insisted on getting a different therapist to take a look, and she made numerous adjustments, and now, once again, I am breathing comfortably.

I can only say that the interaction between prayer and my ability to care for myself reminds me of the verse "Therefore work out your salvation in fear and trembling, for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure". So, God does not give up very easily, does He? And when we see what a great God we have caring for us, it encourages us to believe: "Yes! God has something for my life!"

 ♬      Twila Paris: I See You Standing

A Flame Burning Within

Friendship is real. We have proven it!

♬    STUMBLIN' IN
        by Suzi Quatro and Chris Norman

Our love is alive and so we begin

Foolishly laying our hearts on the table, stumblin' in

Our love is a flame, burning within

Now and then firelight will catch us stumblin' in

Wherever you go, whatever you do

You know these reckless thoughts of mine are following you

I've fallen for you, whatever you do

'Cause, baby, you've shown me so many things that I never knew

Whatever it takes, baby, I'll do it for you

Our love is alive and so we begin

Foolishly laying our hearts on the table, stumblin' in

Our love is a flame, burning within

Now and then firelight will catch us stumblin' in

You were so young, ah, and I was so free

I may have been young but, baby, that's not what I wanted to be

Well, you were the one, oh, why was it me?

'Cause, baby, you've shown me so many things that I'd never see

Whatever you need, baby, you got it from me

Our love is alive and so we begin

Foolishly laying our hearts on the table, stumblin' in

Our love is a flame, burning within

Now and then firelight will catch us stumblin' in

Stumblin'in, stumblin' in

Foolishly laying our hearts on the table, stumblin' in

Ah, stumblin' in, mmm, stumblin' in

Now and then firelight will catch us stumblin' in

Oh stumblin' in, I'm stumblin' in

Foolishly laying our hearts on the table, stumblin' in

Someone sees

Someone Is Paying Attention from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

A little humiliating to have to ask the general public for prayer. But as I think about it, who it should be humiliating for is the Church. The Church has failed so miserably in communicating to the people of the world that Jesus loves us, that a sincere believer like myself is left all alone, accused and misunderstood. And I don't think there's a soul out there who can make a defense for it. Who out there can tell me that the Church in the 21st century is a righteous church? Even the Pope has had to make compromises that I'm sure he wishes he didn't have to make. However, I do not want to get on the bad side of anyone who can spare me a prayer.

If you, out there, wherever you are, can take a few moments to behold my sorry situation, and pray for me, it is all I ask.

Sitting In Limbo (Jimmy Cliff)

Sitting In Limbo from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

A song that gives me hope. I know I talk about friendship. But what most of you do not know is that there is no one to care for me. Only Almighty God. I look to Him for strength. It is His choice alone whether I perish, or whether I revive. His choice. And I say, AMEN.

Friendship with God, Friendship with friends, prioritizing, and who's doing the prioritizing anyways?

It all starts with: I am very committed to friendship. The trust between friends, and the level of comfort that can be established between friends, is a rare and beautiful thing to me. Something worth searching a lifetime for! This being the case, I have personally made some foolhardy sacrifices for friends. Perhaps foolhardy. Not sure I'm able to get God's perspective on my actions too clearly. And the answers will not come in too clearly. This is why acceptance and unconditional love become so very important. You may just be calling someone a fool, who actually is the only one carrying the answers! I only know how my mother taught me, and I will go ahead and share it again:

    One evening when Abu Ben Adem was sitting in his study, an angel from the Lord  appeared to him. "What are you doing here?", Abu Ben Adem asked. "I am making a list of everyone that loves the Lord", the angel answered. Adem asked, "Am I on the list?" The angel said "You are not". Then Abu Ben Adem replied: "Pray thee, write me down as one who loves his fellow man". The next night the angel appeared in Abu Ben Adem's study once again and said: "I am making a list of all those who the Lord loves, and your name is on the top of the list!!!"

This was the greatest legacy my mother left me with. She saw how very much I struggled to please God. She saw that in my efforts to please God, I was setting aside the importance of being kind, and considering people's feelings. And therefore she told me of this poem (which I paraphrased, and which she paraphrased for me) about the how important it is to God that we, as much as we can, avoid being cruel and cold to one another.

This is the nature of the Almighty God I believe in. Why worship, if there is nothing worthy of worship in God?

♬    Nicole Nordeman: Wide Eyed

4 Him - Where there is faith.wmv

Love Lifted Me

Love Lifted Me from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

Being Friends Is A Blessing

Good morning. I am learning that many people don't have any idea how to be a friend,  and that it's alright. It's nothing to feel upset or hurt about.  Those who value friendship and the sincere sharing of love can feel blessed and privileged that our lives are happier and that we exist on a deeper level than the majority. We are very special, and should at all times do the things that will keep us and our relationships healthy.

♬   Mouth and McNeal: How Do You Do

In the Position of Friend... with no friends

So sad. My stats are not high on any of my internet work. And now, 2 friends who I thought would be sticking around for a while, I have gotten very offended with, and decided that if they have that kind of attitude towards me, "bye".

And so I'm left here, with this position of friend, which basically means, I do not have any type of important position. I do not have a paying job, and I've broken all the rules of how to chase after The American Dream. Pretty depressing huh?

But let me tell you, someone here where I live told me I'm good at being a friend. Why? Because I'm always willing to help anyone who is hurting with any type of a problem. I am basically quoting what a worker here said to me.

I'm not like others. I don't play games with people and I don't play games with God. As much as I am able, I carry out what is expected of me. So I have the courage to let go of friendships that were going nowhere. Friendship is a treat, not an obligation. When people know that we are only their friends because we feel obligated, they really have no respect for the friendship, us, or themselves.

♬    Twila Paris: True North

Pass It On

Pass It On from A Friendly Human Being on Vimeo.

A time to raise the banner for RESPECT

I have talked quite a bit about humility. Humility is kind of like the mayonnaise in the tuna salad. It holds things together. It keeps things from falling apart. When we show a willingness to do things someone else's way, we can continue to move toward accomplishing whatever we are attempting to accomplish. Being agreeable is a very likable and oftentimes needed character trait.

However, as the design for living and surviving on this earth has been laid out, there are exceptions to every sort of system that humankind is able to figure out, and so it is with humility. We cannot take the lower seat every time. We are called upon to stay alert in our relationships. Pat responses rarely work. We are to see each event as unique. This has come to me recently because an online friend became blatantly disrespectful, and I realized that she had been taking advantage of me, and that she was not a sincere person. And now I blocked her, and I sincerely hope she doesn't bother me anymore.

So, successful relationships need us to be humble and cooperative, but not at the expense of our self-respect. As much as we are able, we need to gently and discretely let people know that we are not to be taken advantage of. And I know that sometimes people are stuck in situations where they have no control of how they are treated. But self-respect is something that happens within us, so we can always control that.

♬. The Staple Singers: Respect Yourself