Anxiety

One of the best things about having friends is the comfort they give us when we are anxious or upset. Let's take a look at anxiety, and what it means to be anxious and stressed. I know that when I am anxious, I fear that I am going to lose something. I am going to get a bad grade on my report card, I am going to lose function in my kidney, I am going to lose the love of my parents or boyfriend, etc. Something is going to bite into my enjoyment of life. Friends, or even just one good friend, can help.

What I find most comforting when I am anxious, is simply to see that someone is at peace in my company. In fact, almost anybody will open up to someone who themselves is relaxed and at peace. Then, let's say... I'm nervous about something I've said or done. That's a good one. I'll confess something horrible from my own life that I did, for an example: I used to entertain young kids in my home when they came home from school, or in the summer. Well, one day they came over, and they were terribly terribly hungry. And all I had to spare in my kitchen was some packs of ramen noodles. But the ramen noodles were very old, and had gotten bugs in them. And I kept insisting to these children that I could not give then anything. But they kept fussing, and saying that they had to have something to eat. Finally I gave in, and heated up the ramen noodles, bugs and all. And they ate them happily. (Unbelievable). So then, after the kids left, what I had done weighed on my conscience terribly, and I called a friend and confessed. Not sure anymore now what exactly she said, but I felt better about myself, because I acknowledged that what I did was wrong, and honestly told someone that I had done something wrong, and that I knew it was wrong. As I think of it now, there were a number of other things I did while taking care of those kids that were very wrong. I was only in my late 20s, and they were not my kids, and I was not being paid to take care of them. And although there were good things about the way I cared for them, and they came over voluntarily every day, I feel sorry for any harmful influence I had on them.

So, getting back on the topic of anxiety, being willing and available to listen to our friends, even when they need to talk about difficult things, can help a great deal with lifting anxiety, and achieving a closer friendship. In fact, I will say that listening with a (sincerely) open mind is the greatest thing we can do for anyone who is upset or anxious.

This is a bad world we live in. I have reached out to strangers before, both from a heart of knowing how much some people need a friend, and sometimes out of my own despair and loneliness. I just want to tell you, you have to be very careful. Do not be foolhardy. Keep a fixed concept in your mind of your own worth.

♬   Leslie Phillips: Your Kindness

When the horses come for me

Horses from Just A Friend on Vimeo.

Horses - by Margaret Becker

(Lyrics)

Last night I dreamed of horses

Coming for my soul
Taking me to places
I wasn't ready yet to go, no no

Last night, I dreamed of silence
The silence that I keep
All the things, I could've said
Well, they stole away my sleep

I need to remember
The horses will come
(I need to remember)
I need to remember
How quickly they run
(I need to remember)

I want no regrets
When the horses come for me
I cannot forget
That the horses come for me

Last night I dreamed You with me

You put Your finger to my lips
And You told me to be brave now
And I felt like I'd been kissed

I need to remember
You're always with me
(I need to remember)
And I need to remember
You're the reason I breathe
(I need to remember)

I want no regrets
When the horses come for me
I cannot forget
That the horses come for me

Last night, I woke up crying
But I knew I'd be alright

I want no regrets
When the horses come for me
Oh, I cannot forget
That the horses come for me

No regrets
I cannot forget

Last night, I dreamed of horses

International Friendship Day

I Will Never Go from Just A Friend on Vimeo.

Actually, next Sunday (August 2, 2015), not today, is International Friendship Day. I must have been so excited about it I bumped it up in my mind, #embarrassedLOL. But anyways, I want to dedicate this video to all the wonderful people who take care of me here and protect me on so many levels. Sure, it gets crazy here, but that's the beauty of family. It gets crazy, but there's more love than craziness. Love y'all!!!

Next Sunday is International Friendship Day, and this video is about maintaining permanence in those friendships that are the most meaningful. If you are in a setting where you feel needed, and where, realistically, most of your needs are adequately satisfied, that is something to hold onto.

Truthfulness

Truthfulness is so vital to a good friendship. What is friendship for, if not to share what you really think and feel, with someone you're comfortable with? I may have brought up the thought before about people who, when you ask them a question about themselves, instead of giving you a direct answer, they turn around and think for a minute, and calculate what might impress the most, and then answer with that. A complete falsehood. Now, we seek friends because we want to share with someone those things that are meaningful to us. How can we possibly uncover meaning when someone is lying to us?

Then of course, if we want to make friends, we need to cultivate a disposition that we accept others just as they are. If we act as if we are fussy about what our friends are like, if we create an atmosphere with people that makes them scared that we're going to fly off the handle if they tell us certain things, then it will be difficult to find people who feel at ease enough around us to be truthful.

My recommendation is, be yourself around people. When you come to terms with all that is true about you, and feel comfortable enough with yourself to where you don't have to keep secrets, you will find that life can be such a blessing, full of meaning and love! And if you are longing to feel good about yourself also, being truthful is a really great place to start. Because even if you have a past that you feel horrible about, or your present circumstances are not so desirable, when you are truthful, then you at least you have that to feel good about.

♬   Avalon: Take You At Your Word

Create In Me Clean Heart

Only Lonely is a big only

I had to stop here tonight. I called this blog "Always Your Friend", and I feel that always means now. Now there is something different about the way I'm putting together this blog from the way I normally construct my blogs. What is different is that I already have my musical item picked out, and it is actually the song that inspired this blog, rather than where usually the song comes as an accessory to the heart of the blog.

Well the song is about loneliness, and it seems like here in the 21st century, friendship does not even have the same meaning as it did before the turn of the millennium. I think to pinpoint the problem is not that difficult. You see, what has happened is that we have taken the shortcut to friendship by just zeroing in on intimacy. Everything has been sped up so much. With the digital age, we can rely on being able to get anything we want fairly quickly.

But the problem is there is no cutting corners to developing a quality friendship. Friendship takes time. When you are becoming friends with someone, you want to slowly approach discussing certain subjects (politics, parenting, and yes, even sex) to see whether you and whoever you wish to be friends with agree about things that matter to you. You cannot just pick up a person on the street corner, take them home,  sleep with them, and tan ta da dan! Instant friendship!

Yes, well here I am lecturing again, and it's very easy to lecture. Doesn't take much thought or involvement. But you have come here because you need a friend. You need a real friend. What can I do right now to make you feel less lonely? I know for a fact that there are many people lonely. There are many people also, who are stuck in a relationship that is not at all what they had hoped for. And even myself in my own situation. I had a boyfriend, and he was made to move to a different facility from where we both dwelled. Now, I honestly don't know if I'll ever be able to see him again. We were together for twelve years! And it's been hard. And scary.

Let me be perfectly honest with you. Most of my days are spent in a room with a woman who is "unresponsive". She's kinda like halfway in and out of a coma. And the majority of the time, she's the only human with me. I spend a great deal of time on Facebook, sometimes I go on Twitter, IG, and I got Tumblr. Yep. I got a bunch of them. And I do believe, in a unique way, you can touch hearts through social media, and it's nice.

So how do I manage with loneliness? Very recently I have begun to spend more time in prayer. Believe me, there are plenty of things I need to pray about! Also I enjoy creating with my phone. Plus, I've been a paraplegic for over 30 years. So facing all the immense difficulties that have come with that, I have become very strong emotionally. And I have to say it: I know every moment of every day, that God loves me, and that I love Him. Goodnight...

♬   J. D. Souther: You're Only Lonely

Only A Prayer Away

Friendship and Hippiehood - Once for joy, Now for survival

Hippie Freak: Then and Now from Just A Friend on Vimeo.

I Am the Vine by John Michael Talbot

My mother would've called this "being proactive"

Above All - Michael W. Smith

Jesus paid our ransom. He came to rescue us from what sin had made of our lives. As we think on how much He loved us, we should feel very blessed.

"Like a rose trampled on the ground
You took the fall, and thought of me
Above all"

The Holy Spirit - open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week

♬    ONLY A PRAYER AWAY

Only A Prayer Away
by Len Magee

1 One day I heard the ancient story
Of a cross on a hill far away
And now I've a friend up in glory
And He's only a prayer away

Chorus:
O He never would say:
'I'm too busy today'
Every tear, every care,
He's promised He will share
And although He's the Lord of all glory
Yet He's only a prayer away.

2 Sometimes I don't feel much like praying
But He speaks words of love just the same
And deep in my soul there starts flowing
Living waters, songs of praise to His name

Chorus:
O He never would say:
'I'm too busy today'
Every tear, every care,
He's promised He will share
And although He's the Lord of all glory
Yet He's only a prayer away.

3 If I keep the cross e'er before me
As I die I will live day by day
If I sin, If I fall, He'll restore me
For He's only a prayer away

Chorus:
O He never would say:
'I'm too busy today'
Every tear, every care,
He's promised He will share
And although He's the Lord of all glory
Yet He's only a prayer away.

Yes although He's the Lord of all glory Yet He's only a prayer away

Got Your Word On It

Jesus Pt. 1 - Shekinah Glory Ministry (extended version)

Humility - the KEY to every door

I've been talking now for a couple blogs about an event here (where I live) that has come to make quite an impact on my life. I began by talking about a supervisor who had let me down, and how I realized that I had entertained exorbitant expectations of him, and  I was taking it for granted that if I barked loud enough, and aggressively enough, I would get my way. And what happened was that on the evening I described in a previous blog, he decided he had had enough, the heck with it, he could not arrange for anyone to do my nursing care, and that was the end of it.

And so, the Bible says "a rebuke goes 10 times more into a wise man than a hundred blows into a fool", and I must be a little on the wise side, because I became aware of how fussy I was. I became aware of how easily I became enraged with people when things did not go my way. And what has now happened is that I am approaching everyone with more gentleness. Lovingkindness is the word in Hebrew. When I see myself about to say something that is not gracious, I stop and realize, if I say this thing, it is not going to be helpful, and it is not going to have the desired effect. For me, knowing this is a gift from God. PEACE.

♬  Twila Paris: Make Me New

Humility - Friendship gets the victory

OK. So a couple blogs ago, I opened up to all of you about a situation that left me very uncomfortable here in my place of dwelling. Those who were responsible for making sure my medical needs were taken care of, you could say were AWOL. And as I said in my previous blog, it made me very angry, and I wished for the people involved to be terminated, though I was aware that it was not a Christian mentality to entertain.

Well several days have gone by, and though I was furious, and even wanted to take legal action, yet as I reviewed the events of that evening, my heart softened. I began to put myself in the supervisor's place, and understand what went on in his heart. So, I thought, here I've talked to a bunch of people about the incident, why don't I call the supervisor himself, and just talk the two of us, about what happened and how he felt about it. He thought it was a great idea. So as soon as he was able to come and talk to me, we talked. As he told me his perspective on it, I began to agree, and I almost told his story for him, even to the point where he said "Gee it sounds like you're reading my mind". Because see, over the course of a few days, compassion had taken over where so much anger had been at first. He left my room with a very happy smile and said "I feel better". Friendship had taken over.

Too, as I continued to think about the people involved, I found a real fault in myself, and something that I need to stay alert to and wary of. People care very much what I think of them. This supervisor had always shown a great deal of concern for anything I brought to his attention, and done his best for me. And I'm confessing here: I saw how sensitive he was and eager to please, and I took advantage of it. I made inappropriate demands on him, and behaved in a disrespectful, ungrateful manner.

And so, this is what I learned: though I am important to people, it only comes from God and at all times I need to remember, that people like me because I'm likable, and if I cease to be likable, many people will cease to like me, as they should.

♬ The Maranatha Singers: Humble Thyself in the Sight of the Lord

We've Come This Far By Faith

John Lennon- Give Peace a Chance with Lyrics

Psalm 37:35-36

I thought about you all who read my most recent blog when k decided to create this. Because you, I'm sure will understand what inspired me. I just am having a real problem with the worry that the people who hurt me are going to get away with it.