I am at a crossroads once again. In 1979, I graduated with a BFA from Temple University-Tyler School of Art. After I graduated, I lost my mind. I literally went insane. Later I found out that statistics show that the majority of schizophrenia occurs at age 19, exactly the age that I was. And presently my situation allows me quite a bit of time to think, and I realized why it happened.
I had a successful four years of college. I excelled and was considered among the most talented artists in the school. But after I graduated, I could not find the strength within myself to stand up and be counted! Simple as that!
And this apparently, is what happens to many 19 year olds. I look back, and it's almost comparable to being born with a birth defect. there is a complete blank in my life where there should have been a lively drive to be somebody. At least to succeed in my goals as a painter. But nothing.
And so, now I am going to be 57 in September. Every obstacle I created for myself, I was resourceful and determined enough to get beyond. And in spite of myself, I think I might place in the category of an achiever.
Yet this time, I am aware of what happened in the past. I do not want to throw away my chance. I do not want to hide behind humility when it is not required. I am going to be very very careful, and slowly continue down the path that God has created for me.
♬ Wayne Watson: For Such A Time As This
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